Friday 5 August 2016

How to say no when you want to chill

My friend always jokes to me that I need 6 weeks notice before doing anything. He thinks that I can't do anything spur of the moment. Do I really need 6 weeks notice or is there other things associated with this?

It all comes down to how you organise you day. Let me give you how I planned my day today.

I have been working quite hard this week, getting home late and leaving early in the morning so this morning I decided to sleep in a little and just relaxed at home. I then planned to go to the gym and after that I had a couple of work related things to do and then I came to where I am sitting now to write this post and do some other things.

After finishing here I will go home and go to bed. Sounds exciting, right? Well for me it is and that is the way I designed the day.

You might design your day differently and you might have your own ways of relaxing or recharging and that is the key your own way.

I remember a few years ago I had a friend (the past tense is deliberate because we don't speak anymore) who would call me up and ask me what I was doing. When I said nothing that was an invitation he thought to ask me to have a beer with him. I'm sure in his mind he thought that Blair wouldn't say no and if I did he would use peer pressure to get me out. Knowing what I know now I would have no problem to say no because I wanted to do nothing and that is how I recharge but he always seemed to win which when I look back it annoys me.

If you don't want to socialise on that particular night, say no. I know that that can be difficult to say no but you have to think of yourself and do what is best for you.

In saying that, if you have organised that night out sometime in advance, try to think of good reasons why you should go and keep reminding yourself up to the time because I know from experience that come the day maybe 50% of the time you may want to get out of it and I don't think that is fair on the other person or yourself to be honest. If it is the same day and a spontaneous thing then by all means say no.

Know yourself. Know what you like and what you don't like and remember to do what is best for you as I know from experience that if you are forced to do something that you are not keen on it is going to be the last time that you do it because if you are anything like me, you are going to really dig your heels in.

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